paradox

a statement or proposition that seems self-contradictory or absurd
but in reality expresses a possible truth.


i love to learn.

i hate school.


that, my friends,
is a seemingly paradoxical statement.

except it's only half-true.
cuz i don't actually hate school all that much....
just right now when i don't feel like doing all of my

tests.
papers.
assignments.

that's all :)

peace&&love

*ashP*

thinking about life

lately.
i've been thinking about all the things that i want to do in my life.


because when you really sit back and think about it,
there's SO MUCH to be experienced,
and less than 100 years to experience it all!


so then we have to pick just a few of those things.
which is why i've been wondering what i want to pick...
what i want to experience.


especially in these next few years.


i tell one of my friends all the time that THIS is the time to be selfish.
that might sound bad, but it's true.
once you have a family, you have to learn to be selfless basically all the time.
so for these next few years before that happens, i'm going to be selfish.


i'm going to read as many books as i can get my hands on.
i'm going to finally learn how to play the piano.
i'm going to admire art.
i'm going to learn as much as i can fit in my brain.
i'm going to scrapbook and sew and create things from scratch.
i'm going to become a better cook.
i'm going to make new friends.
i'm going to change my mind. (several times...)
i'm going to fall in love again. (maybe several times... :) ha)
i'm going to travel.
hopefully i'll live in mexico for a few months.
hopefully i'll go on a study abroad.


i'm going to be a little better every day.
i'm going to be happy.
because life is beautiful :)


i'm going to enjoy whatever the next few years have in store for me...
because no matter what that is, it will be good :)


love your life...
i know i love mine :)


peace&&love

*ashP*

ode to cereal

since coming to college, i've discovered something.

cereal.
is delicious.

i think i actually eat it for every meal sometimes.
and definitely anytime i want an after-school snack.
or a midnight snack.
or a pre-dinner snack.
really just anytime. :)

because like i said,
cereal is delicious.

so the thing about cereal...
you could just eat it forever.

in fact, i think that's why the infinity symbol exists.
i mean, look!
∞
it's basically a bowl with a spoon sticking out from underneath if you look at it really hard.......

but anyways--you basically end up eating it forever.
because when you run out of cereal, there is still milk.
so you gotta pour more cereal!
and then you put too much cereal....
so you gotta get more milk!

and the cycle goes on and on.

yeahhhh don't even worry about it.
apparently i just think about cereal all the time.
i'm soooo interesting.
HA.
not.

peace&&love

*ashP*

stupid cupid

so so so.
i know valentine's day was a few days ago...
but i'm not the most on-top-of-it blogger.

maybe i should work on that...
eh. probably won't happen
:)

but i was thinking about all the different opinions that exist of valentine's day.

for instance,
some people are bitter.
it's only "single-awareness day"

others think it is the greatest thing ever because their significant
other is basically required to be romantic on this day.

i have my own opinions...

for the past 2 valentine's days,
i had a boyfriend.
so i haven't had to throw myself a pity party.

but even when i had a boyfriend,
i still thought v-day was dumb.
because in my opinion,
your significant other should do adorable and romantic things all the time...
should be spontaneous...
not give you a rose on the same day everyone else is doing it.

now don't get me wrong,
i enjoyed my valentine's day festivities with my boyfriend for those 2 years.
but still.
spontaneous is better.

now this year i had no lover...
and i formed a new opinion.

i decided i like valentine's day.

because i mean, who can really hate on love?
i just thought it was nice to see all the happy couples
and to know that i'll have that again soon enough :)

and even though i had no lover,
i still had my best friend :)
ash bought me chocolates :)
haha so sweet!
even though it totally goes against my new obsession with exercising....
but they tasted good :)

and even though i don't have a boy to love,
i have ash and many other best friends to love!

so don't hate on love...it's all good :)
and cupid will catch up to everyone soon enough :)

peace&&love
*ashP*

temper. mental. temperamental.

so.
i tried blogging like 2 weeks ago.
tried to include pics from my trip to hawaii.

but alas, it did not work.
blogs are too temperamental.
the key words being "temper" and "mental"...
therefore i am not posting that blog because it is basically lame without the pics.

but in other news!!

it's a new semester! :D
and i'm loving all of my classes
i'm even loving all my homework, although it never seems to end...
it is my goal for the semester to actually LEARN.
not just store, regurgitate, and then lose forever.
haha :)
so it's quite fun to actually learn :)

also.
i'm applying for a study abroad in New York!!!
ahh it sounds amazing!!
english classes, side trips to boston, palmyra, and DC...
let alone staying in manhattan!!
but.
i have to apply.
and make it.
which is possibly a long shot.
but.
i'm wishinghopingthinkingpraying :)

haha so i had a friend tell me my blog was inspirational.
i don't really get that, since i've only had maybe 2 inspirational blogs...
but hey.
why not include a little inspiration in every blog?
so here's today's inspiration!

"things which matter most must never be at the mercy

of things which matter least."

always remember what the most important things in life are.
always remember what you want to get out of life,
and then live your life so as to obtain those goals.
never let the little things get in the way...
because those things aren't important :)

peace&&love

*ashP*

día de acción de gracias

that ^^ is how you say thanksgiving in spanish.
literally translated, it basically means 'day of action of giving thanks.'
and it wasn't until i learned that phrase in spanish that i really thought about the word 'thanksgiving' in english...

thanksgiving.

it's not about eating turkey or simply being thankful...
it's about giving thanks.


telling God what He does that you're thankful for.
telling other people what they do that you're thankful for.
telling your parents, friends, and just EVERYONE what they do that you're thankful for.

give them the thanks they deserve.
and then show your gratitude through your actions.

it's SO much deeper than just turkey and pie.
although those are definitely added bonuses, and indeed something to be thankful for :)

so on this day of thanksgiving
(we're on vacation schedule and therefore did things on the wrong day this year)
i want to give thanks for:

the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.
the atonement of Jesus Christ.
the book of mormon.
the temple.
the holy ghost.
my parents.
my siblings.
my siblings in-law.
my nieces and nephew.
my second family.
a fully functional body and mind.
this beautiful world and all the beautiful creations within it.
and
food.

just to name a few of the most important things :)

i am so blessed.
i am so grateful.

life is completely amazing when you learn to find the positive in everything :)

remember to always be thankful, even when it's not the 4th thursday of november.

peace&&love

*ashP*

a new leaf

change: to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc.,

[of something] different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone.

yup.
it's definitely time for some change in my life.

new habits.
new friendships.
new goals.
new-found happiness.

life is so getting so much better.
guess change isn't so bad after all :)

thanks for teaching me that...you know who you are :)

peace&&love
*ashP*

if only life were easy

when i was little, i used to wish that i had an off switch.
this was because i was always afraid to go to sleep,
so i wished that i could just turn myself off at night in order to avoid the scary 'falling asleep' process.

as i get older, i still find myself wishing i had on/off switches for various things...
i wish for an off switch for noise when i'm trying to study.
i wish for an on switch for music when something cool happens because life should come with background music ;)
but most of all, i wish there was an off switch for loving someone.

it's hard when you've cared for someone for so long
and yet, it truly is over.
so i really just wish that there was an off switch for my heart.
but instead my heart is just jacked up.
ugh.

peace&&love

*ashP*

lies

so i've decided romantic movies are total lies.
all this music and all these movies and just all this stuff shows everything working out "happily ever after!"

my frickin eye.
i mean, i believe in happily ever afters, don't get me wrong.
they just NEVER happen like they do in movies.

like seriously it just bugs me.

people do NOT fall madly in love in like 4 days.
nobody ends up with their first love.
and after a few decades apart, you are NOT still crazy about that person.

boo.
i'm becoming a cynic.
guess that's what happens when love dies.

*ashP*

update on life

fact: it's been a while.
therefore i am here to update on my life!

so have you ever heard of vacationing in your own home?
no hotel.
no change of scenery.
just staying home...
well that's one thing i've done lately.
who thinks of these things? honestly...
but, it was actually fun because my wholeeee family was here except for my missionary brother, so it was nice to get to spend time together and play together :)
not to mention my nieces and nephew are so dang cute!!
except that naomi hates me, i'm pretty dang sure.
although.
i'm unsure as to why?
oh well.
:)

then yesterday...
i had a grand adventure!
i went on a cousins date :)
me and my cousins, kalynn and aaron,
each invited someone to go on a triple date with us :)
we first made some pizza which was
DELICIOUS.
and then we went to a drive-in movie!!

i had never been to a drive-in movie, but let me just tell you.
they're legit!
haha it was so fun :)

except.

scott pilgrim vs. the world
=
dumbest movie ever.

seriously.
who even thought of that gay plot line??

but moving on.
literally.
moving on-- well actually more like moving out :)
i've been moving some stuff into my new appartment this week...
and the appartment is sooo cute!!
i'm quite excited to move out!
i'll post pictures soon :)

but more about moving on...
it's weird.

thinking about leaving high school behind...
leaving old friends behind...
making new friends...
and i'm scared to lose dear friends who have meant so much to me throughout high school, all because of a little distance...

life truly is so strange.
but makes so much sense.
high school was a chapter in my life, and now it's over.
it's time to move on, and start a new chapter.

it's just a little scary, sometimes.
not knowing how things will change, or when.
but all things work together for your good...
so i guess i just need to trust and hope.

life will work itself out.
even if it doesn't happen today.
or tomorrow.
it will happen.
so i can trust until then
:)

peace&&loveee

*ashP*